I know every mom has her own strategy on how to rear their child. I believe that we learn to become parents, of course from our parents themselves. We would remember our childhood days and how we were treated. When we became parents they would help us from the time our first-born comes out until the time they see that we could already do it on our own. They would guide us until they accept the fact that we can already stand on our own and should learn from our mistakes when we make them.
When I was younger I used to tell myself that when I become a mom I will not make the mistakes that my mom made on how she reared us and just emulate of course the good ones. Don’t get me wrong, my mom was a good mother. She cooked delicious food (which unluckily I never learned to do) and made sure we eat on time. She would meticulously wash our clothes so that we would look presentable. Being a teacher, she was more conscious on how we do at school and our grades. However, although these did something good on my character and how I am now I just know that we, as mother and daughter, lacked something. We didn’t have a “relationship”. I could only count in one hand the times when we actually talked as “friends”.
When I became a mom, I got a little conscious on how to act in front of my kids. I try very hard on being patient, hold back myself and try not to yell at them. I say every encouraging word I could think of to give them a push when there are times I see them losing confidence. I try to spend time with them; play with them, listen to their stories, make fun with them, make fun of them so they know how to laugh at themselves, and just simply touch and hug them. I believe these are some of the things I needed the most and what I am trying to give to my kids. I want to have a better relationship with them, one that my mom and I didn’t get to have.
With what I have done, here are just a few of my prizes:
” Mommy, when I grow up and don’t have a house yet, I will stay with you so you don’t have to do everything on your own. I will help you. And you will teach me to cook.” – Ryz
“Mommy, my best buddy.” – Ryz
(while fixing their school things day before school opening)
Me: O, tomorrow your classmates might have new stuff for school. Is it okay with you that you didn’t buy new things?
Zyc: Of course! we don’t need to buy new ones.
Once I call out “huggy kuggy”, they will stop doing what they are doing and run to me and hug me.
I sometimes wonder am I really deserving of what I am having now? I thought, “I must be doing something really good to my kids!” or “I must be doing it right to deserve these!” I know I’m not perfect. I am faaaaar from perfect. No mom’s perfect and yet we can be perfect moms in our kids’ eyes.